New Year, New Fear.

This is it. The end of an era, the turning of a page, the start of a season…
The New Year. 

In recollection, 2013 has shaped up to be a pretty eventful year for me: three successful semesters at Brigham Young University, a once-in-a-lifetime trip to Europe, a big move across town, new found hobbies, a few flings…the opportunities this year presented were endless. But for some strange reason, the conclusion of 2013 still leaves me unsatisifed, thirsting for something more. More wanderlust, more intelligence, more culture, more understanding, more peace, more self-discipline, more confidence…more everything. Pretty overwhelming. How am I to knock out all of these cravings with a realistic resolution? Impossible. 

The very wise Eleanor Roosevelt once said, 
"Do one thing every day that scares you."

Eleanor knew. She knew that the only way to grow in life is to abandon comfort zones. And I absolutely agree with Ms. Roosevelt. I have found that I personally work best when I am put under the pressure of uncomfortable situations. Even as the self-improving, nit-picking, over-achieving perfectionist that I am, I also claim to be a seeker of thrills. Thus, I figure, what better way to begin a new year than with resolutions based on my biggest fears? 

I have set out to conquer 52 fears in 52 weeks.

I began by breaking down a few of my basic fears in different aspects of my life: physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual. As I wrote down my list of 52 fears, I made sure that conquering each would better me as a person. I also created some ground rules for myself:
-The fears can be conquered in any order.
-I must do one fear each week. I cannot skip weeks and make up fears later.
-I must have my fears conquered and posted every Sunday night.
-Depending on circumstances, fears may be added or modified.

My 2014 Year of Fear List is as follows:

1. sit in the bar section of a restaurant (drinking a Shirley Temple, do karaoke, etc)
2. talk to a homeless person
3. sky dive (again)
4. drive stick shift (or try)
5. hold a snake
6. talk to a really cute boy
7. get to know someone in each of my classes
8. give a presentation on research
9. speak in church
10. enter some kind of competition
11. make a huge purchase
12. go to dinner and a movie alone
13. confront an ex-boyfriend
14. make a very opinionated statement in public (in a classroom, in a relationship, etc)
15. play guitar or sing in front of a crowd (with at least a few strangers in it)
16. run a marathon
17. get acupuncture
18. ask a boy out (be forward enough to the make plans)
19. move to a place where I don't know many people 
20. go hang-gliding
21. get ice cream from the ice cream man (always been a fear)
22. go on a spontaneous trip
23. hike Angel's Landing in Zion
24. river raft
25. swim with an ocean animal
26. get a new job
27. teach a lesson in church
28. learn a language
29. eat es cargo
30. bear testimony in church
31. live on $30 or less for one week
32. survive a whole week without a phone 
33. invite a stranger over for dinner 
34. knock on doors to meet people
35. give away a Book of Mormon
36. initiate an emotional conversation (break up, deep relationship conversation, etc)
37. be vegan/vegetarian/paleo/gluten-free for one week
38. get legs waxed
39. have a true fast sunday (not eat for a full 24 hours: 3 meals)
40. share an awkward moment with a stranger
41. compliment a stranger every day for one week
42. put myself in a claustrophobic situation
43. go to a bee farm
44. do a backflip
45. start writing a novel
46. ask forgiveness from someone
47. get a concealed weapons license
48. cleverly give away my phone number to a boy 
49. learn how to partner dance (country, salsa, etc)
50. no makeup for a week
51. make a big decision 
52. get a New Year's kiss next year

Bonuses… More fears I think of through the journey...

shark diving
trapeze artist/aerial class
Alcohol Anonymous meeting
Learn to fly a plane
Bungee jumping
Alcatraz Tour

365 days. 52 weeks. 52 fears. 1 girl. 

I have the feeling that something big is in store for me in 2014. 

Stay tuned for the reveal of my first fear post this Sunday… until then, 
Happy New Year, Ya'll.

-C


This project was inspired by author Noelle Hancock in her memoir, My Year With Eleanor. And of course, fear inspiration from my dear friend Anna Ence.